PARENTING BEYOND GOODiES

PARENTING BEYOND GOODiES 

              It is a responsibility bestowed on us when parent decided to bring to the world the birth of a baby when we behold them we forget our wait, cry, labor pangs, morning sickness, body stitches due to tear and the rest, we quickly come to terms this is my own, and we started the planning of what the journey will be like. It is so amazing how the bonding begins, without any formal introduction the child recognizes the voice of the mother. Parenting is what the heavenly sees as the responsibility of the parent to train the child in the way of the Lord and when old will not depart from it. 

            I began to think if it is just ordinary or educative training, it will be so easy, it will just be to get a professional and spend some cash and put the child under a good atmosphere of learning and you will have done a great part of the training or if you are the type that is endowed with much money taking the child abroad to an ivy league or prestigious school will absolutely solve and exclude you from the agony of training and retraining, unfortunately, this and that method does not make a child turn out good either will keeping the child under your watch or engaged in home education do guaranteed success, even a lot of abuse does go on under this tutelage. Mind you, even if the ward in your care is not biological that is not the issue, you are a parent as long as you have accepted the responsibility. 

           We jumped into parenting at times very early because of our desires to start a family of our own while some of us are still tied to the loins of our parents, we thought it was a jolly ride due to what we had growing up, you enjoyed the comfort of a good family, some of us have all at beck and call and that motivates you. Alas!! That is not enough reason to bring a child to this world when you are not ready for the responsibility.              After all this the reality is parenting, has to be intentional no one parents effectively by accident, it must be planned, focused, and have an expected end in mind. The first simple truth parents need to know is that they can only parent the way they are parented, if your parent refuses to model the love, character, and behavior of God before you, you will likely find it difficult to overcome the effects of their examples, as much as we try at times to be tough and wanting to be different we sometimes find ourselves in the old pattern established by our parents.

            Learning biblical principles of parenting is the key to breaking those negative patterns, but will require serious and continuing effort since we are all sinners saved by his grace, none of us had a perfect parent and none of us will be perfect parents. It is now expected of us to commit our way as parents unto the Lord and trust Him to work powerfully in our children’s lives beyond what we can do on our own, the truth is no child become good by accident, it must take a great effort and intentional parenting by the parent. A child psychologist once said that before the age of five a child had formed the basic character and that parent should never regard a time too soon to guide or chastise a child or the parent might be sorry. 

           Allowing biblical patterns to mold us as parent is asking the Lord to uproot the pattern we are used to and teach us His own way and this can only happen under the instruction and teaching of the HolyGhost using the word of God. when we acknowledge our inability and sought for God’s help on how to train our children, we walk in wisdom. The bible says Jesus Christ grew in wisdom, stature, favor with God, and favor with men. When we teach our children and pray for wisdom for them, it really takes the worry from us while we are away from them because we surely know we can never be everywhere with them and for them to make a decision that will be appropriate and channel towards Godliness and good conduct they will need the wisdom of God, undue peer pressure can be averted and serious problem solved when children know when to say no to juvenile influences. Wisdom guides in knowing right from wrong and open our understanding into knowing the consequences of an action before engaging, praying for wisdom for our children must start from the tender age. 

           Growing in stature should not only be limited to physical, outward appearances, keeping fit, there is the tendency for us to do everything within our power to want our children to keep up with appearances that befit our status because that is part of the pattern we might have inherited from our parents or from the society and we gladly do the display of that, leaving self-control unattended to, this is the virtue that enables our children to have good behavioral pattern in any settings they might found themselves. It eradicates selfishness, greediness, proud look, stealing, and all other vices. Society is only waiting to see an uncontrollable being and they will entice such a child further, I believe we do not want to be entertaining unpleasant reports, Let us as parents take time off to teach and pray.

            Having favor with God can only happen in the lives of our children when parents teach and guide them on how to have a personal relationship with God and the best way for them to do that is through our personal relationship with God which is being modeled right to them. Parenting required that we have an intentional quality time of study and pray together with the children, no one can do this better than us because the children trusted us so much in the words that proceed from us. God was so proud of Abraham that He vowed that he will train his children to follow Him. Some children end up believing that because they have been around church and have pastors as parents, they are automatically saved. We need to help save them from this doctrine that only leads to hell, they are observing our lifestyle let us not confuse them.                Finally, having favor with man is the principle of living responsibly among the society, parenting our children to know there are civil responsibility required of them as member of a community is very important, we cannot afford to have children who go about arrogantly demanding for things rather than earning it. We must not leave this aspect of our children’s life to chance, teach them how favor can be the currency that opens some doors and how unruly behaviors could lose them. They can only learn the behavior pattern at home before they can live it in the society. There are alternative theories that the society has for raising the children but there is no inescapable truth that there is no substitute to the parental influence in the lives of the children.